In yesterday's ANSWERS post, I wrote something to the effect: we aren't about to adopt kids and put them in daycare.
We received some criticism for that statement and I think the criticism was fair. I've since changed it to "we feel it is best for our situation that Michelle be at home, and we try to grow a business from home."
That was a poorly worded statement and not very well thought out. I stated our personal conviction as something that sounded like it ought to apply to every one and that ain't right. "Universal truths" apply to everyone but my personal conviction about my own children certainly does not.
We have good friends who have adopted and for various legitimate reasons need to use daycare. I'm sure there are many other families in the same situation.
I often teach about being very gracious with liberty. Stating my opinion in a way that sounds like a broad stroke criticism of those who would do differently is in fact, legalistic and truly insensitive (as opposed to fake politically correct sensitivity). I did that, and it was wrong.
Thank you for the feedback and the deserved criticism. I'm always grateful for respectful and useful criticism. It will help me to be more thoughtful in the future as a writer.
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While we are on the subject of NOT well-thought-out legalistic opinions, here's a perfect example I came across earlier today and was going to write about anyway.
Check out this infuriating nonsense written by Michael Pearl of No Greater Joy Ministries (this part is almost at the end of the post; emphasis mine):
I will say this again. Never adopt children even close to the age of your own. You should be past child bearing age, and your children should be at least 10 to 15 years older than the adopted kids. I don’t think there is any such thing as an orphanage raised child who has not been a participant in sexual perversion. If you are older and your kids are grown, it is a wonderful, full time ministry to adopt foreign kids. You will experience heartache, possibly failure, but you may just save a soul from sure destruction. But if there is failure, at least your kids will not go down with them.I was enraged at such an uninformed, untruthful, IGNORANT comment made to people who look to this man for Christian advice. Is there SOME truth in statement? Yes, there is sexual abuse inflicted on kids who end up in orphanages. ALL KIDS? What biased stupidity.
I don't know Michael Pearl and maybe most of his advice is right on. He may be a whole lot wiser than I'll ever hope to be but he sorely missed the boat with that comment. It is not only untrue, it will serve to scare off adoptive parents, leaving orphans to linger in poverty and (sometimes) abuse. It also stigmatizes all orphanage raised kids as broken, damaged goods.
And sorry my friend, I missed the part of God's command that puts all those conditions on when and which orphans we should care for and rescue:
James 1:27 (NKJV) Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.For everyone out there who has adopted and knows what kind of ignorant hogwash Mr. Pearl's statement is, why don't you go visit his website and tell him so.